SPDT Automotive Relays
from: http://www.the12volt.com/relays/relays.asp
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When the coil of the relay is at rest (not energized), the common terminal (30) and the normally closed terminal (87a) have continuity. When the coil is energized, the common terminal (30) and the normally open terminal (87) have continuity.
The diagram below center shows the relay at rest, with the coil not energized. The diagram below right shows the relay with the coil energized. As you can see the coil is an electromagnet that causes the arm that is always connected to the common (30) to pivot when energized whereby contact is broken from the normally closed terminal (87a) and made with the normally open terminal (87).
When energizing the coil of a relay, polarity of the coil does not matter unless there is a diode across the coil. If a diode is not present, you may attach positive voltage to either terminal of the coil and negative voltage to the other, otherwise you must connect positive to the side of the coil that the cathode side (side with stripe) of the diode is connected and negative to side of the coil that the anode side of the diode is connected.